4 years now... whew, what a trip

Tomorrow marks my 4th anniversary with my wife. I gotta say, this has been NOTHINGg like I ever imagined/dreamed it would be. No, that's not in the good way where this exceeded any and all of my expectations. It's more of a "expectations bar lowered to beneath the floor yet still not met" sort of thing.

We have had our times, good and bad. Active and inactive, crazy and sedate.It is the best of times, it is the worst of times. It was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us.

Yet here we are, at the 4 year mark and I am hoping we last another year. Perhaps that is a good worry to have.... not to take any moment for granted and at any time I, or she, could justw alk out the door and be done with it all.

I asked my wife this am if she had been happy for the last 4 years and she said yes. Then she asked me and well.... I said we had our ups and downs, our adventures and our turmoils, but it's been decent.

Sure, I could have/should have just lied and said it has been nothing but unicorns and rainbows... I just wasn't in the mood to do so this am. She knows that a lot of the trouble that has come to past has been on her. 

Perhaps, in hindsight, it was not wise to get married, then two months later her to start working on her masters degree as well as work full time. But I was behind her, I cheered her on as I was left with being Mr. Mom. Four long friggin years!

Not only did she work, and school in the evenings and weekends, she also was diagnosed with Hashimoto's... which is a "perfect storm" combination I am talking about here!

For those not familiar, this causes one to be not very energetic, definitely not physical, irritable, and just a list of other physical and mental aspects.

Light at the end of this tunnel though... December she graduates... which means less stress, which means I get my wife back. Atleast I hope I do. And her job is easing up some. The Hashimotos, well, we're dealing with it in various ways. We're managing. 

In January/Feburary we'll officially celebrate our 4th year of marriage. We'll go away somewhere, just her and I. Hopefully to reconnect, reestablish that link that has been lost in the last 4 years.

I am both excited and nervous about the prospects of December/January. Will I get my wife back? Or will I get divorced by end of Summer? Both very real possibilities at this moment.

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Comments (16)

  1. Munkyman

    Ayup, this is one of those times I should just say “ayup” & otherwise keep my mouth shut. No good can come from anything more. Happy Anniversary.

    November 02, 2016
    1. knights68

      lol thanks… I think.

      November 02, 2016
      1. Munkyman

        you’re welcome… sort of.

        November 02, 2016
  2. Bettymom

    The first fifty years are the hardest.

    November 02, 2016
    1. comorati1

      why is that so? can you explain?

      April 13, 2017
      1. Bettymom

        It was a joke, based on the fact that I’ve been married over 54 years.

        April 13, 2017
  3. SEC

    Good done

    November 02, 2016
  4. Walkaboutman

    As long as you guys keep talking and ate both honest. If she is battling mentally she needs to be able to tell you. It helps when our partners are made aware so we can be more aware of how we approach things. My wife also has this. Our communication is strong and what has kept us going. We also tell each other to shut the hell up sometimes lol.

    Need to talk BRo I am around, pm me anytime.

    November 03, 2016
    1. knights68

      oh man thanks sincerely, I appreciate that! I’ll take ya up on that offer too!!

      November 03, 2016
      1. Walkaboutman

        The thyroid playing up affects the body and mind big time,something we take for granted but can be pure hell.

        November 03, 2016
  5. rebecca2013

    …..and many more muchacho….. just remember…. it’s easy to give up… give in…. but sticking with it…. is gold!

    communication is key….tell each other how you feel…. be honest with each other….

    November 03, 2016
  6. belladora

    I really do not understand the concept of marriage. Boy, will I catch it for that one.

    November 12, 2016
    1. knights68

      don’t waste your brainpower.

      November 12, 2016
  7. glitterandgold

    I’ve only been married a few months, but when I talk to older people about marriage they all seem to tell me to not forget to keep having fun. They tell me that you have to remember to still be friends.

    January 18, 2017
    1. knights68

      ugh those are some heavy and deep words right thar, yessiree! Thanks for the reminder!

      January 19, 2017
      1. glitterandgold

        You should read “The New Rules of Marriage” by Terrance Real. This Ted talks video is cool too https://www.ted.com/talks/jenna_mccarthy_what_you_don_t_know_about_marriage

        February 02, 2017